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Audi Gods Strike!

sorry for the BW, but I must ask-

How does one appease the Audi Gods?  I've been trying since I bought my
'864KCSQ in April, but with little success.  Last Sunday I made the mistake of
saying "the car's running great" out loud.  Next morning, _BOOM_, dead battery
(fan thermoswitch)...today the car got new clutch hydraulics, but now needs a
new clutch (~ $700).  Last week it was new hoses.  I won't go into the detailed
list of everything I've replaced since I've had the car, but trust me, it's
substantial (especially on a graduate student budget).

Is there some sort of a Pentosin Peace Pipe with which I can satisfy the Audi

sorry for venting...