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More True Facts (no Audi content but amusing)...

I was talking to a hometown mechanic buddy of mine on the phone last
night and asked him if he's seen anything bizarre lately.  He told me this

Some guy goes to pick up his girlfriend at her house last Friday night.  He
parks his car in front of her house and when he comes outside, the car
starts briefly, stalls out and then won't fire up again.  Puzzled and upset
because the evening is slipping away and the girl is in the front seat
dressed to kill, our man starts to panic a little.  The girlfriend opines:
"Maybe it's low on oil".  

He pops the hood and finds the oil-filler cap.  Looking into it with a
flashlight, by golly, there's no oil in there!  The girlfriend's father (not
home at the time), luckily, does his own oil changes so they have several
cases of oil in the garage.  They break them open and begin filling the
engine with oil.  26 quarts later he puts the key in and tries to start the

Mysteriously, it won't even turn over now!  

He digs through his little black book and finds my friend's garage
telephone number.  He's in luck -- my pal is working late that night.  

"Man, the car wouldn't start, so I filled it up with oil and now it's even
worse than before.."

"What do you mean you _filled it up with oil_?"

"Well, we thought it was low, so I just kept adding it until it was full.."

"Don't touch it, I'll be there in a few minutes.."

Normally he wouldn't make a house call like this, but it was one of those
things he just had to see for himself.

He hops in his truck and takes a ride over to where the car is.  After
several cycles, he drains all of the oil out of the engine and puts five
quarts back in.  

The engine cranks, but still won't start.  Then my friend notices the gas

A few gallons of gas later, the happy couple is on their merry way, after
some instructions about how to read the dipstick.

Best Wishes,

'86 5KCSTQ