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OT: Starting problem

No Q content, but in the same garage:

My 91 VW Jetta GLI has been off its feet for a couple weeks, and now it 
won't start (no power at all). So I put it on the charger, but it shows the 
battery as fully charged, which isn't surprising as it's new. While the car 
is on the charger, the is a fairly loud humming sound coming from the 
speakers, even though the radio and car are off (it's louder if the key is 
in the accessory position). Attempting to start the car results in a very 
fast clicking sound, without the engine turning over. Battery terminals are 
clean, though the wires aren't great.

Any ideas? Bentley suggests that the starter is bad, but I'm hoping to rule 
out simpler options.

87 4kq
91 GLI
86 944